I'm a bad-ass. The chicks dig me.
Wednesday, August 16, 2006

I have posted the last four days in a row, and with twenty minutes left in the day, I've decided to try to have a new post every day this week, because I'm already half way there. I've got content lined up for tomorrow, but I have nothing to offer you today, so here's a list of a bunch of illegal and against-the-rules things I've done.

  1. Loitering
  2. Trespassing
  3. Individually selling things clearly labeled "Not for induvidual sale."
  4. Running a red light on my bike. (It's not my fault, the breaks failed!)
  5. Breaking the speed limit.
  6. Taking a pictured in Kirkwood Mall. (I heard it was agaisnt the rules, anyway)
  7. Sleeping with my shoes on. (In North Dakota it's illegal.)
  8. Jaywalking
  9. As a going-away-present, some of my friends in Japan bought me a comic-book in which unwholesomeness is partaken. I smuggled in and was in possesion of said comic book. I don't know if the smuggling was actually illegal-smuggling, but I'm quite certain it was illegal for me to have the book to begin with.
  10. Sleeping in public.
  11. I'm pretty sure I've violated the Alien and Sedition Act many many times. I don't think that law is still in effect, though. (I hope not. (If it is, I renounce citizenship.))

Here are some illeagal things I haven't done, to even things out (not a complete list):
  1. Embezellment
  2. Aiding and Abbeting
  3. Illeagal Lane Change
  4. Prostitution
  5. Grand Theft Auto
  6. Insider Trading
  7. Arson
  8. Juvenial Delinquency
  9. Going to Cuba
  10. Tax Evasion

And just because, here is a list of legal things I haven't done:
  1. Going to China
  2. Sued anyone for failing to warn me that the coffee is, indeed, hot.
  3. Shot an Indian from a covered wagon. (North Dakota!)


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